Confidence is defined as a belief in your own ability to do things and be successful. Confidence doesn’t happen overnight. People who seek it develop it overtime. It doesn’t always mean the outright absence of fear, but the ability to disregard one’s fears and go all out to achieve one’s dreams no matter how long it takes. Below are some secrets confident women have imbibed over time which makes it easier for them to overcome seemingly difficult circumstances.
- Loves herself. A confident woman knows she is dearly loved by God and accepted as she is. To be whole and complete, you need to know that you are loved and most importantly, you are loved unconditionally by the God who made you. God doesn’t love us because we deserve it; rather He loves us because He is kind and wants to shower us with His affection. You cannot love yourself unless you realize how much God loves you, and if you don’t love yourself, you cannot love others; and without this foundation, we cannot maintain good and healthy relationships. Therefore, I encourage you to accept God’s gift of unconditional love and boldly profess it. It’s the starting point of being confident and enjoying wholesomeness.
- Rejects fear. Fear is not from God and keeps people from going all out to reach their fullest potential. It is the devil’s tool that keeps people in bondage, making them retreat, shrink back or run. That does not mean we will not feel some level of fear, but inspite of it, we must forge ahead to achieve our goals rather than allow it hold us down.
Faith is the opposite of fear. Faith is confidence in God and a belief that His promises are true. Faith empowers a person to go forward, to try new things and be determined while fear makes people cower in dread, unbelief and failure. What are you afraid of? Is it your past, failures, rejection, death, darkness, loneliness, driving, aging etc.? Learn to live beyond your feelings. Don’t allow feelings of any kind to dominate you; instead, remember that feelings are fickle and ever changing.
- Avoids comparisons. As long as we compare ourselves with other people, confidence will not take root. The earlier you realise that no matter how talented or beautiful you are, there will always be someone that is ahead of you, the better for you. We shouldn’t derive our joy from being better than someone else, but in being the best we could possibly be. You need to accept the fact that God doesn’t make mistakes. He purposely made all of us different, and being different is not bad, rather it shows God’s creative power. Confidence begins with self-acceptance which happens when we have faith in God’s love and plan for our lives. Always be content in who you are which does not rule out continuous self-improvement, but not at someone else’s terms. Celebrate your uniqueness and be glad in the beautiful future God has in store for you.
- Recovers from setbacks. Confident ladies do not see setbacks as failures. Actually, a person is not a failure if she tried some things and they didn’t work out. Rather, a person fails only when she stops trying. Most successful people today found their way to success by never giving up. A confident woman is not afraid to make mistakes and if she does, she recovers and presses on. Regardless of your past, don’t be afraid. It has no power over you except you allow it. Refusing to allow your past dictate your future is part of the confident lifestyle. Make a decision to learn from your mistakes and move on. Your recovery story can also be used to help other people recover. Never quit because God is always on your side.
- It is said that there are two kinds of people in the world. ‘Those who wait for something to happen and those who make things happen’. Regardless of your personality type, we all have something to overcome. A confident lady is proactive and takes action. She is not afraid of making mistakes because she knows it is not the end of the world. We can always recover from our mistakes. In fact, one of the few mistakes we cannot recover from is the mistake of never being willing to make one in the first place, because God works through faith and not fear. Whether you are an introvert or extrovert, you will always have greater tendency towards your natural trait. I would encourage you to search your heart, and ask God what He wants you to do, and then do it. Don’t always think of what may possibly go wrong, rather be positive and think about the exciting things that can happen.
- Positive-minded. Confidence and negativity never go together. Just like oil and water, they never mix. Actually, being positive or negative is a choice. Either one comes from a habit that has been formed in our lives consciously or unconsciously overtime. God is positive and He is our reality. It has been said that ‘90% of what we worry about never happens’. What is wrong with looking at the sun instead of the clouds? What is wrong with seeing the glass half full instead of half empty? Thinking negative makes one miserable, and why choose misery when you have an open cheque to happiness? Thinking negatively prevents one from seeing opportunities in the midst of problems. It also prevents one from being bold and confident.